Child's Play

I cried in class for the first time today. It was SOOOOO unexpected, i blame PMS. ITS PMS I TELL YOU. i was just sitting there yakking away as usual during chem class, talking about my incompetent new maid, then all of a sudden i was talking about my previous maid who was like a best friend to me. I was so attached to her.. i went on about how nice she was, and i felt tears welling up. So i stopped a moment and breathed. And i thought i was okay again and went on talking about it... and then i talked about the day she was leaving... and i felt the tears again, and it was so hard to even breathe thinking about it all. so i stopped in mid sentence and tried to collect myself. SIgh, and then i went on again... but this time i didnt stop myself in time and tears started pouring down and i couldnt stop it. And it felt so horrible. Gosh, i miss her. I miss her so much.

I guess it hurt to much to think about it, so i never really thought about the day she left, 'cept for that day itself which course, i cried SO SO much. Ignorance is a bliss after all. And today, when i finally talked about everything again, i just could not hold my tears in. I could not hold my emotions in. Sigh, its all so very sad. It was really retarded cuz my chem teacher is leaving, adn she told us. While she was teaching halfway i cried and she looked at me like 'huh?' lol.. and i just kept waving my hands indicating its NOTHING! Hui yee thought i was crying cuz teacher was leaving us. I hope teacher did not think that too. =__=" gosh. That maid left in the end of form 3 anyway, just in case y'all didnt know and was wondering. ='( Thats us on my 15th birthday. I look retarded. screw it. Thats not the main point. she was the sweetest, nicest, best maid ever. and i truly, sincerely, with all my heart, love her. She was a best friend, she was family. Sigh. Why do people have to leave?

Oh and i also had this sudden realization after talking to brenda that after buddhist camp, for once since SO LONG AGO, im proud to be a buddhist. I think i might have felt this way when i was much much younger, but as years went by, i started to forget what it meant to be a buddhist, what being BUDDHIST really is. what IS Buddhism. i was lost and at one point i was only saying 'im buddhist' because thats what it stated on my birth cert. And that was jsut WRONG. I started actually wanting to go to church and Christian events because it all looked so fun and buddhists just dont do anything. Well, thats what i thought then.

And i had this odd perception that buddhists were all chinese speaking people, which is ALL SCREWED UP THINKING BY THE WAY. after last years end of the year buddhist camp, i found out how wrong i was and learned about buddhism again. I was so enlightened by everything and now i can proudly say, i am a buddhist, and i am glad. Im not just saying 'im a buddhist' just cause its in my birth cert anymore, i say it because im proud to be one. if you're a buddhist, you should too.

I cannot believe, when my friend asked me to go for christian camp, and my mom asked me to go for buddhist camp, i actually chose to go to the christian camp. I thank mom for making the decision for me, which was to go for buddhist camp. Whatever it was, though church and all is undeniably fun, i was not ready to give up buddhist as my religion, and now i can proudly say, i am not going to. Because i love being a Buddhist. Everything is clearer now. Its not to you? go attend SJBA (subang jaya buddhist association) organised camps. You'll learn to. that experience has changed me in many aspects. =)

<-- This is damned Cute


- You're already so happy,
Why wont you let the others go.. -


Anyway, today was like every other weekday, a school day. Yesh, thats right!! (bloggers block. does that even exist? daaaammnnn~~ this is bad) So anyway, did my oral today, was really nervous. Gah! you guys know how i am la, my palms get all sweaty and my heart starts racing and i just get SUPERLY SUPER NERVOUS for no reason whatsoever, but thats just how i am. Said a lot of '..uhh..'s between my oral and laughed a loooott, cuz there were times i could not really remember what i was supposed to say. XD but that was OKAY i think, cuz teacher kept laughing with me when i did. so yeah! hehe. (what can i say? im so lovable. HAHAHA *ahem*)

Yong hui was SOOOOOO DISTRACTING!! *grr... imagining kicking the fella* he was sitting beside (well a LITTLE BIT BEHIND TO HIDE WHAT HE WAS DOING) teacher and was giving me thumbs up and thumbs down PLUS lotsa weird facial expression + sticking out his tongue and all. Needless to say, i was distracted. Not VERY distracted, but DISTRACTED. there were TWICE i repeated the same words TWICE thanks to HIM and his antics! *KICKS HIM ONCE MORE* i can even specifically remember what i repeated. which was 'heart disease'. yeah i said that twice cuz my speech got STUCK halfway thanks to HIM HIM HIM *kick*. lolz. Yen Hsian tried helping me a little, cuz before i did my oral i actually recited it out to her. so she knew some of the words, and tried helping me along (actually i didnt need that, but i felt better knowing she was there. =D hehe, love her lots).

There was one point where i DIDNT KNOW what the WORD was, and i kind of glanced at her, and SHE DIDNT KNOW EITHER.. so im like 'uh.. HAHAHAHHA sorry teacher!!' *ah shit* *glances at paper* (sniffles) sadnyyaaa~~~ only looked at the paper ONCE though. So im SUPER PROUD OF MAHSELF! sure you guys are too! hehe! (proud of me that is)

I got full marks for oral! (YAY!) i know that doesnt really mean anything, cuz teacher is actually really lenient in giving marks, but im really content anyway. Oh, and she praised me too! in yong hui's face. HAH!! (grins like an idiot) she asked yong hui 'do you like her voice?' and as expected yong hui didnt answer la, gave like the HUUUHH!??! look. lol. then teacher said 'really good, got potential for public speaking' my heart lifted and soooaarreedd~~ hehe. then we had to sign the oral paper sheet, and i COULDNT, cuz i was so nervous during the whole thing, my hands were actually still shaking. and i kept murmuring 'i cant sign, i cant sign..aaaahh...' xp

Mom failed to mention to me that i was going to get a new maid. So yesterday when i went for my physics tuition class, i had a HUGE SHOCK. Cousin's maid pulled me over into the kitchen and pointed my new maid out to me. and all i thought was, 'HUH!??!?' My mom described my present (well now past) maid as 'naughty'. odd word to use, but you know, whatever makes her happy.

As you all know, my maid went out of the house once (and made up some shit excuse, at first she LIED but after that confessed). She also ruined my mom's expensive new blouse + lots lots more, however, i was growing really used to her. And so, am not really pleased with the change. Im not saying this new maid is BAD or anything, hell no, im just not used to her yet. Its odd. I cant even understand what shes saying cuz it all sounds like gibberish to me. I have to like listen REALLY closely to actually make out the words. *gah* it was like that with the other maid too when she just started. so yeah. What more, my maids name is the same as my cousin's name. So its really just FUNNYly weird. *eeek!!* and she doesnt know how to use all the appliances + keys + dont know whoz clothes are whoz so its like.. have to teach her EVERYTHING!!! its VERY mafan + a bit annoying. Not that i can blame her for any of that but GGAAAAAAAAAHH!! Yeah.

This post was typed yesterday

we had Merentas Desa today. The reason why this post is LATE is because I couldnt sign in yesterday. HORRIBLE I TELL YOU. So yeah, as I was saying, MERENTAS DESA. I started off with sara, but she went on WAY ahead of me. *haha no stamina la* so in the end I was with yuan lu (we actually already planned to run together, so it was ALL GOOD) Apparently Yuan Lu was lying to me the whole way. There was 20 mins left she said only 15 mins left. There was 10 mins left she said there was 3 mins left. She said she did that to motivate me. Haha, really funny la! But really, thanks to her, we both actually got marks for our respective houses, if not top 30. Yeah so we're not THAT strong runners. *sniff* still, I am proud of our achievements. Yuan Lu's really funny and cute anyway. BIT LAME, BUT I THINK IM FAR WORSE. xp

Sara came in 19^th. So super proud of her! =D Owh yeaaah, it was really really funny, cuz at the nearing end of the race, pn hew was standing by the road urging merah members to GO ON RUNNING!! And she saw me and went all ‘1007!! WO ZHI CI NI!’ (I support you) and kind of PUSHED me forward. XD so for that LITTLE MOMENT I had that GUSH of energy and sprinted…. For… awhile….. and then…. *ahem*.. I stopped running for like 2 seconds and sprinted (im so slow you cant actually call it sprinting towards the gate but screw it. I sprinted. SO THERE.) towards the gate…. And came in 47. which ISNT SO BAD. ISNT SO BAD I TELL YOU. Yuan lu, 49, due to some people who were PARADING down the road like they owned it. They were like walking in a straight horizontal line not letting people pass. How VERY annoying. Me being the rude, mean, unkind, lousy ass person I was, kind of split the people apart with my ‘excuse me’, ‘sorry’ and ran past them. Yuan Lu did not really do much of that cuz shes so NICE. Too nice for her own good I say. TOO NIIICE!!! Learn from the ever-shoving li may figure. *spotlight shines on me*

My number was REALLY cool anyway, it was M1007.

so lotsa people were going all 'HOR 007!' *yeah, plus my lame self who doesn't cease being lame at all times. =D THAT'S MEEEE!!!!* so its like MI 007. don't tell anyone of my secret identity or you might get killed. *sshh* really cool number anyway. Had the prize giving session for all the top 30 runners. Was very upsetting as the youngsters had NO SPIRIT AT ALL. ZILTCH! We all went 'I SAY MERAH YOU SAY ROCK!' 'MERAH!' *no response*'MERAH!' *no response* oh bloody hell, that was embarrassing, alright. And then Suping and Nicole went to boost up their team spirit (or at least tried to) by running through the lines they were sitting in telling them to cheer for our house members who won. And they looked up at them like they were retarded idiots. THAT WAS SO ANNOYING. I just felt like knocking their little heads!!! (GAAAHH!!!! *kicks ‘em kiddos*)

But our red house wasn’t the worst. Blue house was WORSE. Really saddening. I don't know what is WRONG with the kids nowadays. Eu Chern said he actually looked at those KIDS around him and told them 'what WRONG with you all? SHOUT LA, you all RETARDED arh?' he was WAITING for a response from them kids, expecting to be scolded back at, but they just looked at him.. and then ignored him. THEY'RE ZOMBIES! THE WHOLE LOT OF THEM. *grr* Felt so retarded screaming by ourselves, there were even some kiddos using their hands to cover their ears. Like WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM LA. NEXT TIME JUST DON’T COME OR SOMETHING DAMMIT. *grr somemore* Purple house had lotsa 'house' spirit. They were all screaming and everything, seriously, I was so jealous. And couldn’t stop myself from smiling at them. THAT'S THE SPIRIT!!! =D

Screw it. Im not talking about that DEPRESSING moment anymore.

After Merentas Desa, got back at around 12. Bathed, ate lunch and slept for half an hour. Went to 1 Utama at 1pm. Was extremely tired but who would pass up shopping, right? Got back at 6. Slept for another half and hour and got up, went to 1 Utama again to catch the movie 'Stranger than fiction'. I was really quite glad at where I was sitting because I was sitted beside this super HAWT European guy. *HAHA* The show is pretty good for all those interested. =D go watch it!! Its pretty funny. Well at least sis and I LAUGHED a LOOOT, though not the whole cinema was cracking into fits of laughter la. The hot dude laughed too. Laughter is contagious, I bet my sis and I influenced him. Or so I like to think.

Sis and I still think that Harold Crick should have died. What a classic happy ever after ending. Not that it wasn't expected, but yeah. A tragedy would have been, more twisted, and interesting. In fact, I would have cried. Ah, not all movies are like the movie 'skeleton key' which had such an unexpected ending.

Oh by the way, when we were looking for parking before the movie, we drove into this lane where there was ALREADY a car waiting for people to hop into their cars and drive away. There was this couple walking towards that car… mom was praying that we would be lucky so that the couple would walk pass that car and come closer to OUR car so we can take the spot. Which is exactly what happened. =D Lucky us. Anyway, this other car came along from the OPPOSITE DIRECTION *its only a one way street, so it wasn’t right for the car to have turned in from the other direction* and waited. This other couple went into their car. And the car which was PREVIOUSLY waiting wanted to take the spot, but so did the car from the opposite direction. Lets label the PREVIOUSLY THERE CAR as CAR 1 and the CAR FROM OPPOSITE DIRECTION. CAR 2. Its easier for me to narrate that way.

So CAR 1 was driving into the spot and CAR 2 tried to do the same, resulting both cars forming like a 'V' shape with the front of their cars almost meeting. Mum, sis and I were about to make a right turn into the mall when we heard the man from CAR 1 get down from his car and started yelling at the man from CAR 2who winded down his window, but got down too later on. CAR 1 = Chinese man. CAR 2 = Malay man. SO guy from CAR 1 is shouting something like 'HOW CAN YOU DRIVE THIS DIRECTION. CANT YOU SEE NO ENTRY BLABLAAA…' and then guy from CAR 2 was saying something I could not hear as he wasn’t shouting at the top of his voice. Mom super kepoh, wanna stand closer and watch, but sis pulled her and me away as it was best not to get involved.

As we were walking into the mall, shoutings were still to be heard and I even heard like this Whacking sound. I think maybe one man hit theother. Im not entirely sure. And then, this really cool sporty car with BLUE lights *whoa* drove past the lane in front and made the police car siren sound with some *unknown to me* device. Really cool. Im not sure if they stopped fighting after that though, cuz we left. Didn’t want to get involved, as stated earlier.

Bottom line is, I thought both sides were overreacting, especially the man who was shouting so much. Like COME ON, its JUST A PARKING SPPPACCCEEE. *groans* whats wrong with the world today? Honestly. Everything is becoming more and more absurd day by day.

That concludes the end of my post! =D Gonna go get some shut eye, really really tired. Lonnng day, as you can tell by now. G'night folks!

Ps. lookit the really cute teeny toothbrush i was given by the orthodontist! =) theres actually two, but im already using the red one.

Havent been posting the past 2 days cuz i didnt feel up to it. haha, braces been killin' me!!! im Glad to say that, the pain has FINALLY more of less SUBSIDED! =D i still cant bite with my front teeth cuz if i DO, they WILL hurt, but if i dont bother them, they dont. so im just REALLY relieved and happy now. Hence, the blogging. xp

Aaannnyywaaay....

I Love this SONNNG~~